Friday, 03 July 2009

  • Pyrotechnics

    Independence Day is one of my favorite holidays. For starters, I like it because it signifies the birth of one of the most unique, bizarre, and ultimately one-of-a-kind nations in recorded human history. It's not perfect by any means, and some of the culture it supports I find reprehensible, but at its core, it offers the opportunity of success for anyone with a crazy idea that might get ridiculed anywhere else.

    The second reason I like this holiday, and arguably the biggest, is the use of fireworks. Sweet holy Moses, I love fireworks. Every year I use them, it's like I'm able to take everything I hate in the world - rude customers, trashy culture, greedy businesses, my own insecurities - and blow it all up. When I feel powerless at work, on the 4th, I see that thought fly up in the sky and explode into a spectacular display of burning gunpowder and brilliant magnesium. When the cowboy dumbass from Taco Bell starts pushing my buttons by being rude to the cashier, on the 4th, I stuff him into an artillery shell and watch him light up the night sky in blue-green copper explosion. The obnoxious people I deal with in society become amazing aerial bursts and black powder reports on Independence Day.

    Now, let's go blow something up.

    Dm_concept3a

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